Proficiency

When I was formally studying Spanish, I remember there was a point at which I realized I was thinking in Spanish, and that that step of first thinking in English and then translating to Spanish had disappeared. I think I've finally hit that point with Chinese, and let me tell you, that is a thrilling realization.

Chinese is, in some ways, easier than languages like Spanish or French because there are no verb conjugations, no past, present or imperfect tenses. In many ways, however, it is much more difficult, from the tones and pronunciation to sentence structure and characters. I think the most difficult thing about Chinese is the fact that you have to readjust the whole way you think about language. It's not just different words, it's a whole new way of conceptualizing communication, of thinking about the meaning and significance of words. Up until very recently, when I wanted to figure out what someone was saying, I first had to listen to their pronunciation and call up the pinyin (the romanization) in my head. Then I had to match characters to the pinyin, and then figure out what those characters altogether meant. The process got faster with more study, and I think at the very end of my semester in Nanjing, I was starting to get to the point of eliminating at least one of those steps.

But it wasn't until just recently that I realized I'm thinking in Chinese, and no longer jumping between English-pinyin-characters combinations. When I say "wo chi bao le," in my head I see "我吃飽了." It's actually slightly difficult for me to read pinyin now, because I'm so used to seeing characters.

I'm not saying I'm in any way satisfied with my level of proficiency. My tones still suffer greatly, especially with characters that I learned a long time ago and, until recently, got away with pronouncing in less than standard manners, and my sentence structure and grammar still tend towards English patterns. But most of my conversations are in Chinese now, and I don't feel uncomfortable or nervous about going into a store or a restaurant and having to negotiate a bill or reserving a seat. I'm sure that says something about my level of self-confidence and carefree-ness about making mistakes too, but I think there is noticeable improvement in my Chinese, and I hope I can really solidify that improvement over the next few months, so that when I return to the States, I can tell potential employers that yes, I can speak Chinese.